So, I got into a little trouble last night. Not trouble like I'm going to have to sleep on the couch all week, but trouble. Well...I may have been in the 'couch' kind of trouble, but Makena was home to save me.
"Hey, did I tell you guys that I volunteered to deliver food to a local food pantry?" I nonchalantly say as I'm getting dinner ready
"Mom!?!" - "Sweetie!?!" Jamie & Makena respond at the same time
"I thought we talked about this?" Jamie says as Makena says "I thought we talked about you not volunteering to do so many things."
hmmm...I don't remember having THAT conversation. I remember Jamie telling me that I couldn't volunteer for The Forgotten Network/DoeNetwork (from the new tv series The Forgotten) to help with unidentified, missing persons. And, I remember Makena telling me that I volunteer for too many things. But, I don't recall any other conversations. (That's my story and I'm sticking to it!)
"Well, it's a volunteer schedule that I can sign up to do as often as I want. It's called Fork it Over and I just pick up extra food from school cafeterias and deliver them to a local food pantry." I continue to tell them...waiting to see if they were as excited as I was about it.
"Yuk" Makena says "Who wants our cafeteria food?" Apparentlly she wasn't excited about it.
"People who don't have food." I remind her "I drop Makena off at school and then drive to the schools on my route. I'm out there anyways. It's not supposed to take more than an hour. I can do it once a week, once a month or whatever."
"Sweetie - this can't cut in to your work. From 9 - 5 you are supposed to be working." Jamie "the boss" says
"I'll have to work late on Wednesday then, cuz I won't be in at 9." I smile (with no return smile from him) Maybe I need to find an assistant?? "Let me just see how this month goes."
So, I did my first pick up/delivery this morning! After getting back in the car from my 3rd stop, I realized that the car smelled like drive-thru. I don't really like fast food, so that's not a good smell to me. Good thing I was in Jamie's car huh? (He didn't find that funny when I told him about the smell tho.)
I found the food pantry; mostly because there were several people with small children just standing around a building. Some had boxes, others had carts or baskets. I rolled up in the Benz, ready to full-fill my volunteer duties. (Actually, I was ready to just give all of those hungry people the food I had as well as the coat I was wearing.) A nice man came out with a push-cart to unload what I had brought.
"I can get it." I say as I reach in to grab a box.
"Oh, it's okay." he says "You don't have to touch it."
Here is where I will refer again to 'the Benz'. It seems that I always end up driving Jamie's car when I need to deliver food, blankets, clothes, etc to shelters - which just makes me feel bad. He constantly reminds me that I shouldn't feel bad for things that we have - things that we've worked for. I don't...but I do. The car is 10 years old and well loved, but it's still a Mercedes. For some reason I don't always feel that way when I drive my truck (a Toyota Tundra - new and more loved by me). I'm just assuming that I'm being judged for driving the Benz and I'm not sure why that bothers me. I know I am judged for things, but those things I don't care about. Okay...off topic now...back to Fork it Over...
"I can help." I tell the nice man and grab a box.
"Thank you so much for your help." he says as he begins to return to the food pantry "We really appreciate it."
That's all that I needed to hear - I'm now over the Benz thing! Wheww...glad he brought me back down to Earth.
If you are interested in volunteering with Fork it Over, or know someone who would be, let me know. You get to do a good thing and have your car smell like drive-thru!
AMBER-JAMIE-MAKENA The most wasted of all days is one without laughter. -e.e. cummings
Loved this post on so many levels. (and love the new pixs on your blog heading too by the way :) )
ReplyDeleteYou do so much for so many don't forget to do the same for yourself. That being said I think its a great thing what you are doing with Fork It Over. Especially since its a on your own when you can type thing which is perfect to add into your busy schedule. That way you don't feel like you are letting yourself or those that rely on you down.
I feel bad for what we have sometimes too. Which like you say you do, but you don't. But we are not trust fund babies and know personally what working hard to get things is and also what having nothing except hard times is as well. This is a great position to be helpful from because you can relate to those people you were helping feed. ((Remember dumpster diving at Vernonia market? Yowsers. ))
If you feel bad about something, like the pulling up in the spendy car thing, question how you would reply if someone said something to you. Allowing yourself to defending yourself to this imaginary situation remindes you of who you really are and how unimportant it is what is precieved by others. Just think, you might actually teach them something in return. Like how not to judge other people. Something they surely feel while waiting in that food line.
On a new topic :) DoeNetwork is pretty neat I found them a few years back. There are also places you can find missing or unsolved cases in your own town or neighboring towns for a smaller scope.
Love you big sister!